I'm glad you're not focusing too much onthe sexual side of a situation like this. It really looks like it should, rather than adhering to anime stereotypes. So good job there!
I enjoy the art style you used. Very soft and you managed to make most of them look real. I especially like how you have everyone doing something different. You also got their personalities spot on from what I can tell.
But my biggest critique on this would be Twilight's face. Out of all of them, which is probably the reason it stands out so much, her face looks the most unrealistic and silly. I also think her whole stance should be a bit different; like, I know what you were going for it, but for some reason it didn't come out right.
Still, the piece is a good one that I enjoy looking at. I know how much work you do to get it this good, so awesome job, mate.